Dear Fans and Readers,
I have been diagnosed with the autoimmune disorder known as Multiple Sclerosis, or MS. To put it simply, my immune system has decided that my nervous system is the enemy, and it is waging periodic attacks on the protective tissue surrounding my nerve endings. These attacks result in temporary neurological difficulties and extreme fatigue that can affect daily life. There is no way to predict the duration, severity or frequency of the attacks or “flare ups.” Over time, and with repeated attacks, neurological difficulties such as paralysis or vision loss, can become permanent.
Every MS Patient experiences their own unique progression of symptoms and there is no way to predict what course my MS will take. However, the Doctor said that given that I am starting treatment with minimal damage and am otherwise healthy, and because of recent advances in medication, it will probably be 20 years or more before I experience any permanent disability.
I am posting about this publically because it is such an unpredictable illness, and because I want to be proud of who I am and not try to hide my struggles with Depression or MS. Everyone in the world is fighting some sort of battle. Never forget that, and remember to be kind.
One month ago, a Doctor looked me in the eye and said, “When a patient suddenly loses sight in one eye, obviously our first concern is some sort of brain growth.” When you hear something like that, suddenly all your priorities are clear. As I lay in the MRI machine, this was my prayer: “Let me live. Let me write. Let me continue to be a wife. Let me become a mother.” As far as I am concerned, MS is the answer to that prayer. I knew that something was wrong with my body, but all I wanted was for it to be something that I could manage. I can manage MS.