Throughout their whole childhood, Finny and Autumn were inseparable—they finished each other’s sentences, they knew just what to say when the other person was hurting. But one incident in middle school puts them in separate social worlds come high school, and  Autumn has always wondered what if…

The night she’s about to get the answer is also one of terrible tragedy.

“The finely drawn characters capture readers’ attention in this debut . . .Autumn’s coming-of-age is sensitively chronicled, with a wide range of experiences and events shaping her character. Even secondary characters are well-rounded, with their own histories and motivations . . . Readers will relish the opportunity to climb inside Autumn’s head.” -Kirkus Reviews

“This sweet, authentic love story masks complex characters dealing with complex issues: single parents, divorce, only children yet ersatz siblings; high school, college, the pull of the clique; love, friendship, sex, and teen pregnancy . . . First-time author Nowlin keeps the story real and fast paced, avoiding the melodramatic.” -Booklist


111 thoughts on “About IF HE HAD BEEN WITH ME

  1. I’ve read the book If He had Been With Me countless times, and I never grow bored of it. Each time as I read the ending, I cry for Finn and Autumn and even The Mothers. The ending makes me feel and get emotional, but I guess I enjoy books that make the reader feel something. At the end, I am curious, they said Autumn’s mother’s depression could be genetic, would Autumn commit suicide for Finn’s death? And what becomes of Autumn after Finn’s death? I’m put through torture all the time by wondering. The ending is the best part, yet it isnt satisfying! But Thank you sooo much for writing this book. Its my favorite book.

    1. Hi Josahina, thank you so much for your message. Autumn won’t commit suicide because she is probably pregnant. I know the ending doesn’t tie up neatly, but in real life things never do, and I wanted the story to be realistic. Thank you again for your message, it means the world to me to hear from readers!

      1. Hi Adamari,
        Thanks for your message. Finny died because, well, people die. Someday someone you love will die unexpectedly; that’s just a fact of life. I want young people to read IHHBWM and realize that they shouldn’t take anyone they love for granted, because life is unpredictable and sometimes cruel.

  2. Hi Laura! I just wanted to let you know that this is honestly my favorite book and it’s really got a place in my heart. I am now convinced that my first child’s name will be Autumn lol. I’ve read it about 5 times now and every time it just gets better. You really are amazing and have such a way with words. I’m very excited to read your next book. I hope you’re feeling better as well.

    Love, Angela

    1. Hi Angela!
      Thanks for your message! It would be such an honor if you were to name your child for Autumn! If that ever happens, PLEASE let me know! I have been feeling better, modern medicine is amazing! Thanks for contacting me, and keep reading!

  3. I just purchased this book and finished it all in one day, it was that good! I knew what was coming but the heartbreak I felt at the end of this book was devastating! I connected so much with the characters to the point I felt like I was a part of the story and I really wish Autumn got her “fairytale ending”. It was heartbreaking knowing how much pain she was in from Finnys death and I really hope there will be some sort of epilogue to Autumns story because I want to know more about what happens to her! I absolutely loved, loved, LOVED this book! I seriously couldn’t/didn’t want to put it down. You are an amazing author and I can’t wait to read your next book!

    1. Thank you so much Breanna! I appreciate your message so much. Autumn ends up okay, but that’s really all I can say. I don’t have plans to write about her again, I think I’ve put her through enough. I do have a new novel that just came out this month though. Thank you again for your message; hearing from readers means the world to me.

  4. I bought this book not even a full month after it had been released and it has been my favorite ever since. I’ve lost count on how many times I’ve read it and I can honestly say I don’t think any another book will EVER replace it in my heart. I read it at a time where I needed it the most and even to this day I cry like a baby! I torture myself doing so but it’s okay because I just love it that much. I swear when I saw it made the NY Times bestselling list I jumped up and down screaming with excitement. When I finally decide on the perfect spot I WILL have an autumn leaf tattoo because she’ll forever hold that spot in my heart. I’m so excited that this book is totally getting the hype it deserves and I can not wait to start your next book! (:

    1. Thanks so much Larissa! It means the world to me that you love the book so much! Please send me a pic if/when you get that tattoo! I hope you enjoy the next book; I want to warn you though, it is very different from IHHBWM. Thanks again for your message and for reading!

  5. I just read If He Had Been With Me in about 5 hours and now I can’t stop crying! It was such and amazing book and I absolutely loved it! it makes me want to write stories of my own! Telling all my friends they need to read the story by the female John Green!

  6. Laura, I read this book for the first time in 8th grade and completely fell in love. I am now 17 and continue to read it every year and love it even more! You really inspired me to write and I would really love for you to write another book, you’re writing technique is astonishing!

    1. Hi Kaylyn, Thanks so much for your message, sorry it’s taken me so long to reply. I actually have another novel out THIS SONG IS (NOT) FOR YOU, though it is very different from IHHBWM.

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